Coping with Feelings

A major concern for many families as their parents age is caring for their needs. How to ensure good health care, finding a right living situations, resolving the older parent' personal problems are all issues that cause the family members to become overwhelmed. When the parents are living a distance away increases the dilemma.
Ideally the parents take control of their own situation and make decisions in advance of an emergency.

Communication with parents about the possible need for change is not always easy. Many people put off serious conversation to avoid conflict. Talk with your parents in a gently and honest manner about their wishes. These discussions are most successful while the parent is in good mental, emotional and physical condition. These conversations can often bring families closer and open the door for future communication.

-Show your feelings reassuring the parent of your support to help resolve problems

-Allow the parent to voice their concerns and retain as much control over their lives as possible

-Encourage small changes in order to allow the parent to adjust to changes

-Find resources which will enable you to educate yourself on medical, legal, and financial matters. Know where to find the help needed to make the best decisions when they become necessary.

-Respect your own needs. You have a life. Your parent has a life. Work together to find the solution for both of you.

-A GCM can offer options and resources to smooth out the emotional and sometimes guilt-ridden decisions of planning for your parents.